Queue the awkward silence – or don’t.

(Image Cred: WeHeartIt)

I don’t know if anyone has noticed – but are people still having real ‘getting to know each other conversations’?

I don’t know – sometimes when I meet people it is the most awkward thing (because I am an introvert and yes, I am one of the most awkward people you’ll ever meet). Every time it’s the same thing over and over and I think with that I have become so used to it- I know what the person is going to ask and quite frankly I don’t want to tell him/her for the millionth time about my job and whether I enjoy it or not – because quite frankly not everybody really cares.

It has become such a force of habit when meeting people, the first two questions are: ‘What’s your name’ and ‘What do you do for a living’, people have lost interest in really listening. They then switch on talking about themselves and as soon as there is no resonation either one of the two awkwardly walks away. (Yes that would be me awkwardly sipping on my drink as I walk away.)

Look, I am not saying everybody is like that – and I realize I might be at fault too. Why don’t I make more effort in the conversation? But really – what do you talk about when you’re stuck in a dead-end job and kind of feel like you’re not as interesting as you really are; no one is interested in that.

I decided to write this post and suggest ideas for topics and ways for a conversation to not be as dreadful. I did research on this don’t worry:

4 Ideas to Make a Conversation Not-So Dreadful:

Listen:

Listening is key to any form of communication you encounter. People have become so focused on what they are going to say next that they forget to listen. When you listen, your reply will come naturally and the conversation will flow easily.

Body Language:

It is important to note the body language of the person you are talking to. When you are talking about something and the other person looks uncomfortable, chances are, they are. So try and swiftly change the convo.

Ask meaningful questions:

I am not saying you must share your previous relationship details with the person you’ve just met, but ask questions that you are really interested in knowing. Previous experiences, music taste, interests, goals and dreams. Lately people have become more comfortable about talking about their previous relationships – so if the convo leads to that and you both feel comfortable enough on sharing, why the hell not?

Be Positive:

If you are friendly and have a positive vibe about you, people will more likely be able to approach and talk you.

Topics to talk about:

Here are a few topics to talk about, other than the weather:

Current events: What new movies, albums and books are being released? What band will be performing live? So you can learn whether you have equal interests.

Views/Religion: I suggest keep religion to a minimum as most discussions on that can become heated. Perhaps informing the other person about your religion and Vice Versa will be enough until time progresses. Views on the other hand are interesting features which make you unique. It’ll give a better understanding of each other, to each other.

Love: It might be a sensitive topic, but it is always interesting to find out if a person is a hopeless romantic or a cynic. The reasons behind each choice might be surprising.

Friends: Perhaps you have few mutual friends, which means you will probably meet up again soon.

I am sure when the conversation is flowing, everything will fall together. Remember to ask for a number to stay in touch.

Look, I am also not implying that if you are out in the club you must throw out all the deep shit. Let’s be honest, guys and girls are there to party, drink and have a good time; then you will get the 2% who are out looking for a suitable partner in the club. You don’t need these tips when you are intoxicated, the alcohol does the talking for you. (We’ve all been there). So, if you are like me, awkward and sort of an introvert – please don’t turn to alcohol for your better judgement. Thus the reason I wrote this post – so you can face the situation head-on.

You’ve got this. (I’ll try it too)

Love,
Tasia

 

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A Dreamer Trapped In The Ordinary

You know in movies when the character stands still and the whole world is rushing passed and around him/her? Well, currently that is how I am feeling (I don’t know about anyone else). Time is moving faster than lightning and I cannot seem to keep up. It literally feels as if I have fallen off the face off earth; I guess this is why I haven’t been writing as much as I used to. I normally write about life experiences that happen around- and even to me. But, as of late, nothing really exhilarating has happened in my life that is worth writing about. I am a dreamer trapped in the life of the ordinary.

Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against the ordinary life, people prefer life that way; I think I do too in a sense, it is a form of safety, comfort. But, at a certain point you lose your sense of wonder. Everyday after working my 8-5 job, on my way home, sitting in traffic and looking at everything going on around me; I observe all the people goin- no, rushing home. I look at them and wonder: “What do they really want to be?”, they all work really hard and you can see it- in their faces and bodies. They all rush to get home to their families to do their second job of the day. That is the lives people live. Regardless of the fact that I know that there is so much more to life, I know they know it too. Unfortunately, the ordinary life entails bills and other responsibilities which leads people to push their dreams and goals aside and focus on ‘what is important’. I have a quick question: is it possible to add your dreams and goals to your responsibility ‘pile’? It probably differs from person to person… but it gives you something to think about.

Life has become such a rush that we forget what is important in life- what we want in life and how short life really is. It is important that you do what you want to do in life, you have to make yourself proud. I know it is funny coming from a ‘dreamer that is trapped in the ordinary’, but that is why I am writing this; I am writing this to encourage anyone and everyone not to get caught in a place they do not want to be and feel they do not belong, because a person can get sucked in before a blink of an eye.

If you are like me, a dreamer- stuck. You are capable to go where you want to be. It is going to be tough and it is going it to be hard. But just know, there is someone else in this with you- and probably a million others.

Some parts of the world dreamers do not belong, if you find yourself not at home- leave.

Until next time,

Tasia
xo.

Be Inspired, by Yourself

BY TASIA BRUMMER

We often look for inspirations outside of our comfort-zones, which is of course where we should look and where we will find inspiration majority of the time. Mine for instance is, going outside in the evening, looking at the night sky with the moonlight and millions of stars among it and realizing how much more there is to life. But, it had me thinking, inspiration is everywhere to be found and we look in all the places except within ourselves.

Sure, you haven’t been as successful as you had hoped you will be in this certain time in your life, but you most definitely have achieved more than you think you did. Like the famous quote of “It is funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back a lot have changed”- surely does its purpose; it may seem like you aren’t getting anywhere, but take a step back and take a look at your life, the things you have achieved- no matter how small they are, like: living in your own apartment (that you are paying), having your own car (which you bought), finishing a course you started and even meeting new people- those are all achievements you have made along the way.

You had hoped to step into the life you had always imagined after school or college, but you aren’t there yet. These things take time, focus on what you want to accomplish and always keep in mind the things that you have accomplished, as those little accomplishments are the motivation and inspiration you can always look back on when inspiration is nowhere to be found.

One thing is for sure in life: nothing comes easy and some people are luckier just than other. But, don’t doubt yourself, you really do know more than you think you do.

The Rise of the Poets

The social media has been blowing up with aspiring authors and poets around the world these last few months and they keep on growing and evolving as time goes on. It is amazing to see how words can bring the community of writers and nonetheless the whole world together. Their work is absolutely pure, honest, realistic and optimistic at the same time and written in such sense that any person around the world can feel a relation with the writers work. The support is astonishing from everyone around the world towards these writers, I can see no other reason for the fact that they make you feel; no, they make you know, you belong.

I am sure you have come across a lot of images with quotes and sayings on it that you felt you relate so much to it that you saved it to your device and shared it on your social media platforms. Names like R.M Drake, Anita Krizzan, Jessica Katoff, J. Kenneth Banks, Michael Faudet, and Christopher Poindexter have been trending all around the world.

R.M Drake

R.M Drake who is located in Miami, has 718k followers on Instagram and continues to grow. He writes about everything in relation to life: love, freedom, chaos, pain and the art of letting go. Even celebrities like Khloe Kardashian reposts his images on her Instagram account. I bet if you go to the ‘Explore’ tab on Instagram now, you will see his work on your feed.

Anita Krizzan

Her work represents everything she loves about life. Her belief in the beauty of love between the man and woman, hope and her optimistic
view about life. Truly inspiring.

Jessica Katoff

When Jessica started posting her work on Instagram, she only had 9 followers; she has grown to a whopping 2k within only a few weeks. “I started writing these poems to bleed dry the pain of a love lost”, says Jessica in one of her posts to show gratitude towards her followers. The emotion of pain can clearly be felt when you read her poems, also, because we all have suffered a certain and the exact type of pain as Jessica has and that is why her work moves people the way it does.

J. Kenneth Banks

This Australian writer (and super adorable, I just had to throw that in), also a lover of life and love, a believer of the beauty in life’s little things and a true optimist-realist. Every Friday he has a competition called “Free Shit Fridays”, where he gives away a signed poem you shared, but obviously ‘terms and conditions’ apply. Give him a follow to see how to win.

Michael Faudet

He is the writer, poet and author of ‘Dirty Pretty Things’- There is only one quote from him that describes his work hands down: “Words are powerful things. They can break hearts and make panties wet.” You can expect a lot of that, his use of words is truly amazing!

Christopher Poindexter

His famous quote: “And in the end, we were all just humans, drunk on the idea that love, only love could heal our brokenness.” Which has possibly reposted more times than I could count, but is also a piece that describes his work. His use of words describing a woman’s- and his own feelings, the love of the moon and stars, also the pain and the art of letting go. He too, gives away signed copies of the poems you like. Follow him to see how you could win.

These poets, authors and writers’ work and writing style are all very diverse which is what makes them all unique. However, their love for writing and their belief in love, life and pain are things they all have in common. By that, they move the world as one community who relates to all of their work.

I highly recommend that you go and check them out, you will get another sense of seeing life as it is.

There are plenty of other poets out there that need support too. Just type in #poets or #poetsofinstagram on your ‘Search’ tab and well, enjoy!